Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Randomize
