look no pants
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Randomize
