This phone does not accept mass texts. Try again.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
