I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
