my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
