I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize