we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Randomize
