omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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