I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
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