I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
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