Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
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