Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
