I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
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