i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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