You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
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