UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
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