We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize