just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Randomize
