i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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