i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
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And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize