i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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