When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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