doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Randomize