Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
