Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Randomize
