A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
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