no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
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I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
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