What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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