ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
