How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
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