Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize