Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
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