Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
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