The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
The beers last night were like the tears from god
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
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