Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
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