So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Randomize
