I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Randomize
