belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Randomize
