We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Randomize
