I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
He kissed a someone with a penis
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
