The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
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