What a fucking waste of an outfit
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?