in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
