the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
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