Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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