Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
Randomize
