big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
