This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
