wrigley field is MILF paradise
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
