can we get nightvision for the apartment?
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
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