wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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