I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
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